When Pride Hinders Repentance
INTRODUCTION.
A. When was the last time you said, “I’m sorry,” or “I was wrong”?
1. When was the last time you apologized for a wrong deed, a misstatement, an error in judgment, a sin against a brother, a momentary inappropriate emotional response, etc.
2. Some people may jokingly say, as soon as I am wrong, I will be happy to apologize.
3. Other people see no need to apologize because they have justified their actions or have no respect or care for the people whom they wronged.
B. What does it mean to offer an apology?
1. The word apology means: “. . . 2 : an admission of error or discourtesy accompanied by an expression of regret . . .” (Merriam Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary)
2. The word apologize means: “to make an apology” (Ibid.)
C. When should a person apologize? When he has made some error in judgment, has made a misstatement, has sinned against a brother, has sinned against the Father in heaven, has committed an inappropriate emotional response, etc. , he is to admit his error and offer a sincere expression of regret. This is what it means to apologize.
D. Now, having said all that, let me ask you this question:
1. Have you ever done anything for which an apology was due, but you did not give? If so, then this lesson is for you.
2. Are you guilty of justifying all of your misdeeds and misstatements, thereby removing the need for apology? If so, then this lesson is for you.
3. To everyone else, listen carefully, because I have designed this lesson just for you as well.
I. APOLOGIZING AND REPENTING.
A. What is Repentance?
1. Repentance is a change of mind.
a. In Matthew 3:8, John told the Pharisees and Sadducees, “Therefore bear fruits worthy of repentance.”
b. The Greek word translated as repentance is metanoia {met-an’-oy-ah} which means “1) a change of mind, as it appears to one who repents, of a purpose he has formed or of something he has done” (Enhanced Strong’s Lexicon)
c. The word repent, as used in Matthew 3:2, is translated from a similar Greek word, “metanoeo {met-an-o-eh’-o} which means “1) to change one’s mind, i.e. to repent, 2) to change one’s mind for better, heartily to amend with abhorrence of one’s past sins” (Ibid.)
d. To truly repent, one must change their mind away from the sin.
2. Repentance requires remorse or sorrow for the sin. (Cf. 2 Corinthians 7:8-12) If you are not sorry for the sin or error, then there will be no true repentance.
3. Repentance is a change of action.
a. John told the Pharisees and Sadducees to “bear fruit worthy of repentance.” (Matthew 3:8)
b. Paul told the Jews and the Gentiles that they should “repent, turn to God, and do works befitting repentance.” (Acts 20:26)
c. To bear fruit worthy of repentance, you must have a change in one’s actions. You cannot say, “I’m sorry” and continue in the same action and call it repentance. We will talk more about this later in the lesson.
4. Repentance requires an acknowledgment of the sin or error.
a. Consider the following Old Testament examples:
(1) Psalms 32:5
(2) Proverbs 28:13
(3) Psalms 51:1-4
b. Confession of one’s sins to God is also taught in 1 John 1:8-10.
c. Consider the case of Simon. (Acts 8:18-23) Before he could change, he had to acknowledge his sin and then turn away.
5. Repentance requires the guilty to repent of his sin to the person against whom he sinned. That is, he is to express his regret and remorse for the sin he committed against the other person.
a. Matthew 18:15-22
b. Luke 17:3-4
B. One cannot repent of a sin or error without apologizing for the deed. Since apologizing means to express one’s regret and remorse for the wronged action, a person who is “repenting” must experience such regret and remorse and should express his feelings to the offended party.
C. Do you think a person can repent of a sin against another without feeling and expressing his regret and remorse? If you think that this is possible, then your understanding of true repentance is flawed.
II. EGO AND PRIDE HINDERS REPENTANCE.
A. No one likes to be wrong. It hurts our pride and ego to acknowledge that we have been wrong. While apologizing can be part of a growing process, many people treat apologies as if they are the plague.
B. Too often, one’s ego or pride will prevent him or her from taking the necessary steps of repentance.
1. They will not admit they were wrong.
2. They will blame their error on someone else.
3. They will excuse their error.
4. They will find fault with those who have exposed the error.
5. They will find fault with those against whom they have sinned.
C. Pride is a sin. We must be willing to humble ourselves in any and all situations.
1. 1 Samuel 2:3-5
2. Psalms 10:2-6
3. Malachi 1:6-8; 2:17; 3:8-9, 13-15
4. Proverbs 8:13; 16:5, 18-19
5. Romans 12:3
6. 1 Corinthians 10:12
D. Pride has led some people to use deception to get around repenting.
1. If your charge is not specific in every detail, then they will deny the accusation, no matter how close you may be with the facts.
2. They will make no admission, unless absolutely forced by irrefutable evidence.
3. But, at this point, is it genuine repentance, expressing sincere regret and remorse for the deed or action?
III. EXAMPLES OF SINCERE REPENTANCE.
A. King David.
1. 2 Samuel 12:1-15
2. Psalms 51:1-4
B. Paul repented and then faced the very people whom he had persecuted.
1. Acts 9:1-19
2. Acts 9:26-28
C. The man who had taken his father’s wife.
1. 1 Corinthians 5:1-5
2. 2 Corinthians 2:5-8
CONCLUSION.
A. No amount of time will remove the need to acknowledge and repent of one’s error. Apology is never out of season. It is the coward who is afraid to apologize and admit his wrong. It is the brave person who is willing to face his errors and admit to what he has done.
1. If you sinned against the Father in heaven, then confess your sin to Him, and with a remorseful heart, ask Him to forgive you.
2. If you have sinned against a brother, then acknowledge that sin to the brother and express your remorse through repenting of that sin.
a. Sin of not loving.
b. Sin of not being willing to forgive.
c. Sin of gossiping.
d. Sin of spreading rumors.
e. Sin of hurting their feelings.
f. And any other number of sins or errors committed against your brother.
3. If you did not sin against your brother, but you were wrong on some other point, fact, thought, action, etc. then be willing to say, “I was wrong.”
4. If you sinned against someone in the world, leaving a bad impression, etc. then ask that person of the world to forgive you.
5. If you have sinned against this local body by bringing reproach upon the church in not living and behaving as a Christian, then express your remorse to this group, repenting of your sin against us.
6. If you have sinned against this local body in another other way, then express your remorse by repenting of your sin against us.
B. If you want to live a happy life, practice saying, “I was wrong,” “Please forgive me,” and “I am sorry.” People who pretend to be right all the time live a terrible life of having to sustain a lie. People who are willing to repent and apologize will not carry a load of guilt and deception on their backs.
C. Is there anything of which you have not yet fully and clearly repented? If you feeling godly sorrow over your actions, express that remorse, repenting of your sins and saying, “I am sorry.”
D. If you are not a Christian, being today by repenting and turning to God. Obey Jesus’s command in Mark 16:16 and Acts 2:38 and you will be saved and your sins will be forgiven.
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When Pride Hinders Repentance -- October 26, 2003 -- File # - 508
by John M. Duvall -- Lawton, OK